I feel like: I suck at blogging. I suck at deadlines and trying to keep goals. I suck at maintaining followers or a following. I feel like I suck whenever I try to do anything. I haven’t had the will to type or post anything to my website for a while. So why I’m I back to doing this again? The reasoning may be difficult to understand. Even from my logic and understanding, but I’ll try to explain as best as I can.
The last post I did was discussing 1917. After I posted, I let the number of views (Only two views after a week) get to me. It was discouraging because I wanted to feel like I was doing something important. I did something that I shouldn’t have and let the lack of views get to me. I post my blogs to many of the social media sites that I use, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Etc. There were likes, congratulations, great jobs, and “I like the article.” But when you only have two views and getting praise from multiple people, you can’t help but feel that recognition and words to me were crap. They were saying that to attempt to cover some support for me. To me, it looked like they won’t take time out to help me with my posts. Help give me valid criticism to help make me a better blogger. I shouldn’t be like this, but I can’t help but feel defeated when you are trying to get your work out there for others to see and share, But no one looks at your or helps me out after doing some thoughts about this. I’m going to try to stay away from views and write for myself. If you’re going to read my posts excellent, but please don’t tell me that you’ve seen or read my blogs, when I know that you haven’t done so. If you’d like to prove that you read a blog I post, I recommend that you comment or share them.
We also had a pandemic hit and is still going on at the time of this post. Nearly everything in the US had shut down due to Coronavirus, or Covid-19 from March and is still going on at the time of the post. There aren’t any movie theaters showing movies or escape rooms to escape. There were some exceptions if the job that you had was an essential business to the public. My job was considered essential, so I had to still go to work.
I was working a lot. When COVID hit, I all of a sudden become essential to my job. It was a bit scary given what we were going through, but my fears subsided on this virus. My company gave me bonuses and incentives to work. I workedfifty to sixty hours a week from March to May. I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to do so. I was earning more than I would have worked regularly. Nothing was open around my area and the US, so what else was I going to do. It was exhausting, and I wouldn’t recommend it as I was very irritable after eight weeks of doing that.
Other than that, I haven’t been up too much, as I said I was working six days a week. It is physically and mentally draining. The schedule that I had kept me on wake-up eat, drive to work, work ten hours, and go home, eat, and sleep. I haven’t had time for many movies or games. Things are easing, and our state is slowly opening up again. Being away from blogging made me miss what I originally wanted to do. My job, while paying my bills, isn’t my passion. I want to write and shoot photos and videos. Discover video games and other types of gaming out there. Maybe even blog about different topics that can help others out. It took being away from my blog to realize what I missed.
In terms of movie and game blogs, I’m finally going to concede and make posts using a more review style. Most of the reason was that I don’t want to sound preachy whenever I post about a movie or a game. Just a reminder that any review that I do will not be final. There may be a chance I like something at first but then changed my mind later down the road and vice versa. I’m still going to discuss films and games, and they could contain spoilers. But I’ll give a fair enough warning and will keep it towards the end of the post.
I also held off on reviews, because I wouldn’t say I like doing “X out of Y” stars or a graded scale. One of the reasons that I didn’t want to do any reviews. I like something, don’t like something, or have a weird in-between or a “gray zone.” For the past few months, while trying to figure something out, I got an idea from the COVID crisis. Well, not so much the disease, but how Pennsylvania handled the reopening process. We had a red, yellow, and green process for opening up our state. The reopening concept became an idea and inspiration to have a method of talking about and getting a review. I am using a gauge system to put with my posts. So you know what I thought about a movie or game.
The gauge is red, yellow, and green meter. Green means I liked whatever I saw, played, or experienced. Yellow is the in-between I didn’t like what I saw but didn’t hate it either. Yellow is my Gray zone category. Red means that it was terrible, and I didn’t care for whatever I saw or played. There will be a needle that will point on the gauge where I thought what I was talking about ends up. Now, I may have to enter a number in my formula to move the needle. Just because it’s more on the right on the green or left on red, doesn’t mean that I liked something more than another film. There are still going to suggest: Green=good, Yellow=good/bad, Red=Bad.
That’s all I got for this update. I will hopefully have a blog posted soon. I am working on my first post in a few months. Thanks for reading, and I hope that you will help me grow as a blogger.
Hey Tom, it can be a bit dispiriting at first, releasing your carefully chosen words to minimal response. But as in life, the more you put in, the more you get out; the more you read and contribute to other people, the more you get back. The numbers are less important than the connections. Good luck!
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Thank you for your comment. I’m hoping that taking a step back and self-reflecting was the refresh that I needed.
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hey Tom, I took a moment and read some of the rest of your blog; it’s pretty good. The more you read other blogs and comment, the more people will follow you; the actual content you have is good enough. Once you pass the first couple of hundred followers, it becomes much easier to get readers; the first bit is the hardest. You’re also activily thinking about how to make your blog better; I’m confident you’ll find an audience.
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Thanks again, and thank you for taking the time to look at some of my posts.
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